Milton and Horton

Horton Hee’s a Haw is the new donkey on Shannon’s farm. He came from the donkey rescue to help Milton Burrow get over the loss of Chloe, his beloved companion horse. They’re both so sweet!


The Donald Trump of Lambs

“You’re FRYER-ed.”

He’s cute… but he’ll eventually be food.

Another Monday

It’s the start of another business day at the DMV.

The line forms early and long, filled 1/4 with people who were forced to take a half-day off work to handle a transaction that should only take 10 minutes and very easily could be handled over the internet if the DMV had only arrived into the 21st century. The other 3/4 of the line is filled with people who obviously are not missing work, but have missed a few baths. Everyone in line is talking loudly on their cellphones.

In seeing the long line, the DMV personnel respond quickly and decisively by all going on break except for two of them.

After 2 hours, the Goat Triplets are finally at the counter, only to learn that they are missing a form. The form resides at a table across the room, which will cause them to lose their place in line. Should have taken the whole day off, silly goats!

Tundra and her pups


Tundra (of The Woof Pack) is working so hard to take care of her nine puppies. But I think if dogs could say, “Calgon, take me away!” she’d be saying it right about now. They’re a week old. CUUUUTE!

Did I not tell all ya’ll?

Sometimes I post on facebook and forget to post here… did I neglect to tell all ya’ll about the Lightscoop? (Read about it here, but save shipping costs and buy it from Adorama through Amazon.)

I have two cameras. An older model Nikon Coolpix that takes crappy pictures, but it’s point-and-shoot, and a fancy Nikon D40x that would take great pictures I’m sure, if only I’d read the directions for it. Well my Nikon’s flash pics have always left me lamenting the $700 I spent on that camera. The Lightscoop won’t fix all flash photos, but for residential home snapshots it works like a charm. Best $30 I ever spent. Behold! (Click the pictures to see them as God intended – BIG!)

This was the first try with Lightscoop. I hadn't read the directions yet (sense a theme?) and didn't know that I shouldn't use my zoom lens... I took this from about 12 feet away. But I think it still turned out much better with the Lightscoop.

My brother Chris does not think the Lightscoop helps the subjects of the photos behave any better.

Kiwi didn't hurt Chris' arm. It was a bicycle accident. Finally, an injury in my house that DOESN'T involve Kiwi's murderous intents!

Action shot with the Lightscoop. (Blanket on chairs because it was raining that week and my backyard was Lake Muddy-Paw-Paw)

Murphy action shot: "Oh you WOULD bring out the camera when I'm caught without my tube of 'nose gloss'!"

Look at how much bigger Kiwi has gotten, compared to Murphy's size! Ignore the croc in the background. You do not see the croc. This is not the croc you are looking for. All you see is a clean house. Yes.

At this point, you're not even reading any more, are you? I think every picture is unique and magical and special. But all you see are the same two dogs in slightly different poses. You don't care. You don't even care.

Who is photobombing who?

Kiwi launches herself on my couches with such violent delight, I'm amazed I still have furniture.

I got to sleep!

So Kiwi celebrated her 8 month birthday by taking a trip out to Shannon’s kennel. Back to the breeder from whence she came, for a little spa time. We were calling it “farm week” but since Shannon is working on training her, it’s more like a boot camp. Paw Camp!

I miss her but am enjoying getting to sleep through the night.

Dammit, Kiwi!

I was so mad at Kiwi yesterday! First, she started her usual “wake Mary up at 3 am” antics. After about an hour and a half of that, I gave up trying to sleep and decided to get an early start on the chores of the morning.

I was taking the trash out to the bin in the garage when I heard the deadbolt on the door to the house slide shut. Kiwi had just locked me out of the house by jumping on the inside of the garage door and turning the deadbolt! It was 4:30 am and I was in nothing but a t shirt and underwear and all doors to the house were locked!

So I’m locked in the garage thinking f*%k, how do I get out of this one. No key, no cell phone, nothing. Luckily a shower curtain was in my truck for Goodwill donation, so I wrapped that around me. I knew the back window over the kitchen counter was open only a crack and had a wooden dowel in the track for security so it wouldn’t open further. Could I get in that way? (The window is really high off the ground, like about 8-9 feet.

The window was not open wide enough for me to get through though, so I took a stepladder from the garage (luckily I had my crocs on or walking in the back yard rocks would not have been fun) and I climbed up and ripped a giant hole in the screen and got the screen off, then used the pooper scooper rake in a “power McGyver move” to reach over to the inside window frame and wiggle the wooden dowel out of the window track so I could open the window. Much to my amazement it worked, and the dowel popped out! I was barely able to climb in the house using the top step of the stepladder. So I hurled my fat ass through the window, shower curtain, crocs, and all.

Once inside, I found a spare housekey and hid it in the garage to prevent such a travesty in the future. This is the third time she’s deadbolted me out into the garage (I leave and she frantically jumps at the door). The first time I had left the back door open, and the second time I had my housekeys with me – not so lucky this time.

If that window hadn’t been open, I would have had to wait a few hours in the garage, then go to my neighbors wearing a shower curtain and had them call a locksmith, or wait in the closed garage until 2 pm until my dog walker showed up to let me in.

I guess no one called the cops so its nice to know someone can break into my house without anyone caring 🙂 I’m still pretty mad. And now I have to buy a new screen.

*&%&^%^& Kiwi!

Moose Flashback

Moose at his first vet visit, the day after I got him. Ten weeks old and 14 pounds, if I recall correctly. September, 2002. People say, “How did you end up with a St. Bernard?” Look at that face!

Kiwi’s eyes

Kiwi, at seven months old, has cataracts in both eyes. I guess the white thing I saw in her left eye a week ago (that alerted me to a problem in the first place) that has since went away wasn’t the cataract but a glob of fibrin that was caused by severe inflammation – the cataract made her immune system go crazy and the firbrin glob is a by product of that. The good news is we caught the cataracts early. Right eye stage 1, left eye stage 2 (stages go up to 4).

Diagnosis right eye: Incipient juvenille cataract with good vision
Left eye: Juvenile hypermature cataract with marked resorption (the resorption is the good news)… limited vision and secondary severe lens-induced uveitis

I’m giving her steroids left eye four times day, right eye once day, atropine both eyes once every other day, and we go back next Saturday for a checkup.

The assistant told me that cataracts “never” go away on their own and “always” need surgery. But the doctor was amazed – he said it appears Kiwi’s immune system is attacking the cataract, at least in the left eye, and making it better. But she may still need surgery. The right cataract he said she could live with, since it’s not limiting her vision.

He said the apparent resorption of the left one would be amazing but will have to check next week.

(She weighed 52 pounds at her appointment by the way.)

The first visit cost $192 bucks, and next Sat the visit alone will be $135 bucks not counting meds and tests.

If surgery is necessary, pre op tests run $600. Surgery for both eyes will be another $3200 if lenses are needed. $2950 if it’s only removal of the cataracts needed.

Needless to say there is no way I can afford that so I’m trying not to get upset just yet, and wait and see what he says next week.

I’m so sad. 😦 I’ve been crying all weekend.